Beckies Spot

So, I’ve started writing about the top ten reasons women cheat (according to an article I read online).  I feel that 9 of them relate and come down to one thing (the tenth one) which is “the relationship isn’t that serious.”  I’m going through them one at a time, and I encourage you to read the last couple of posts.

Today, we are discussing another reason that the article alleges.  According to it, women cheat because:

You aren’t getting what you want…..

Perhaps I should have just included this in with the last one (you are bored).  Getting what you want….wouldn’t we all love it if we could always have whatever we wanted?  First of all, life does not work that way.  You have to work for what you want.  You really do.  Hard work pays off.  I tell my patients at work that motivation and determination go a very long way.  And it does.  You have to really want something to get it.  Part of getting what you want is communicating.  First, ask yourself what it is you want.  Now please let me take a moment to note that if you want to be treated as a decent person, you want to love and be loved, you want to know you are important, you want to be acknowledged and you want to feel special……that is not too much to ask.  These things come with any relationship- romantic or otherwise.  If these things are not a “given” then I would say right then and there that your relationship is not that serious, and in fact, so not worth it that I feel it would be acceptable to walk away now.  You are a person….not a door mat or a sperm bank to be used at the customer’s convenience.  But, if there are other things you want, you have to learn too communicate what you want.  Now, if there is a communication problem, you have to fix it.  Find a way to get the message across.  If you cannot find a way to communicate, perhaps your relationship just isn’t that serious.  If it were, you could talk about anything and everything.  This, I know.  I truly do.  Communicate what you want, or seriously consider that your relationship just isn’t that serious.

But, I also have to point out that if you are able to communicate what you want and they just don’t understand….or they chose not to give it to you, perhaps it is because they are just not that serious, making your relationship….just not that serious.

Sorry.